How to Walk Into a Car Meet Alone (and Own It)

The first time I walked into a cars and coffee alone, I sat in the car park for eleven minutes rehearsing opinions about camshafts. This was unnecessary. Here is what I know now.

The rules nobody tells you

• You don't need to bring an interesting car. Half the crowd came in hatchbacks. The cars are the excuse; the talking is the event.
• Questions beat statements. 'Is that the 4.2?' opens more doors than knowing everything. Car people love their cars more than they love being right - use it.
• The owner is always nearby. Never touch, never lean, never open - but ask, and suddenly you're getting the full restoration saga and a look under the bonnet.
• Arrive early. The first hour is owners and coffee and honesty. The third hour is crowds and phone cameras.

On feeling like the outsider

You won't be one for long - but it can feel that way the first time. Two things are true at once: most people are lovely and genuinely delighted you came, and occasionally someone will confidently explain your own car back to you. The correction is one sentence, delivered kindly, with eye contact: 'Yes - I did the timing chain myself.' Watch the weather change.

The exit move

Before you leave, say goodbye to one person you spoke with. That's it. Next month you're not arriving alone - you're arriving back.

The Sydney Diary lists every meet worth your Sunday. Start with a coffee one. Wear comfortable shoes. Bring opinions.